Alright, lovebirds, you're about to embark on the wildest ride of your lives, and what better way to kick it off than with vows that are as rad as your love story? And yet, the very subject of writing your own vows is something that repeatedly sends my couples into a tailspin. So I’ve pulled together this blog on the art of creating kick-ass wedding vows that'll leave everyone wiping happy tears.

Tips For Writing Vows | Wedding Celebrant Blue Mountains

Get structured

The number one question I get asked is “how should we structure our vows?!” and look there’s no one perfect answer to this question - like so many things, it’s up to you. One of the most popular and effective (at least in my humble opinion) options goes something like this:

A sentence or two about why you showed up (sounds weird but like, you made a choice to come get married, share why!)
A sentence or two about why you love your partner or what you’re grateful for
A sentence or two about what you’re looking forward to in the future
A series of promises you’re making to your partner on that day

Need a further helping hand deciding what you’re going to include? Here are some hints and tips for getting there.

Hit rewind

Now’s a good time to hit rewind on your relationship. Remember that time your partner did something adorable that made you realise just how much they meant to you? Or when you realised you both share an unhealthy obsession with the same TV show? Those moments can be a goldmine for your unique vows.

Speaking truth

Sure, fancy words and Shakespearean sonnets are nice, but what’s even better are your authentic voices. If your everyday conversations involve memes and movie quotes, sneak some of that magic into your vows. The key is to keep it real – just like how you both keep it real with each other.

Make promises

I mean the hint is in the name right - to take a vow is to make a promise. Your vows are the promises that set the tone for the epic journey that is your marriage to your fave person. Wanna pledge to have each other's backs through bad hair days and all the rest? Go for it! I usually suggest that couples focus on an odd number of promises (say, 3 or 5 or 7 - don’t ask me why, it just sounds better) and match their tone to the tone you’ve asked me to create for your ceremony - if we’re shooting for irreverent and hilarious, include some funny ones as well as serious ones, but if we’re trying to get big feels, make them deep and lovely.

Devil in the details

Don't just limit yourself to "I promise to love you forever." Get specific! Do you promise to always love that weird laugh-snort they do? Or do you promise to always keep the ice cream stash replenished? The key to make your vows the most you they can be is included these joyous tidbits, and trust me you’ll remember it more than “I promise to be yours forever”.

Lean on me

Even the best vows sometimes need a bit of editing, or a vibe check, and the perfect person to do that is your celebrant! Not only can I help you put your thoughts onto paper if that’s what you’re struggling with, I can help ensure that you and your partner are delivering the same kinda vows - it wouldn’t be great if one of you delivers a 5-minute diatribe on your sincere love, whilst the other cracks jokes for only 30 seconds! I’ll help make sure they match and give you real feedback on what’s gonna land and work in the context of your ceremony and knowing you both the way I do.

Practice but be chill

No, you don’t have to remember them by heart - even if you did the nerves would probably make them fall out of your head on the way up the aisle anyway! Give those vows a few practice rounds, but remember, it's not about perfection; it's about the feels. So, rehearse, but keep it chill, and remember that I’ll have them printed out for you on a nice bit of non-crumpled cardboard not stashed in a bra or pocket so you’ll have them there to refer to.

So there you have it! Crafting epic wedding vows is all about embracing your love story's quirks, laughs, and inside jokes. These vows are your time to shine – raw, real, and so very you. So whether you're trying for a laugh or a tear, know that your unique promises are what will kick-start your adventure as a wedded duo.

Writing cracking vows